I walked the 5 miles around Stone Mountain today to compensate for the 2 pumpkin pancakes I had at IHOP. Screw this optifast crap.
I didn't lose another pound during the second week; I actually gained one pound; my body turned gray; my intestines stopped (remember the joke about the asshole, well it's accurate); i looked and smelled like death; and did I mention that I didn't lose another pound!?!
So again, screw this optifast diet.
I began eating real food again, and the weight once again started to drop.
So I was at the dentist's office and met a woman who was going to an acupuncturist for weight loss treatments. I think to myself, "why not?" She said she lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks with needles and herbs. So I call the miracle worker and make an appt.
As she is sticking needles all over my head, ears, arms, fingers, legs and feet, I ask, "how does acupuncture work for weight loss." She says (and I kid you not), "if you are in less pain, you will exercise more." Duhh. Then I ask, "well, how does acupuncture work for pain reduction." She answers (and I kid you not)," the pain gets transferred from one area to another so you don't feel it in the same area." Well...just stomp on my damn foot for that one. I don't need 35 needles poking out of my skin for that one. She then leaves me in a room with soft chinese music on to "relax" with 35 fu***** needles sticking me in every imaginable piece of skin she could find. RELAX??????
Needles to say, I cancelled my next two appointments. I won't mention that I had holes in my skin for the next 4 days and scabs on my ears.
And stupidly I made an appt for Monday because she INSISTED that it DOES help and I WILL feel better. Am I gullible?
No...just dreaming and hoping for a magic miracle.
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